Superman Vs Pokemon
by MiscellaneousSoup
Summary: I do not own anything! Someone asks Superman if he can "catch them all!" Superman becomes addicted to Pokemon. Hilarity (hopefully) ensues. Read and review, if you please, and have an excellent day!


**A/N: Random idea that I thought of. Read and review, if you please! (It's my catchphrase, by now. Emoticon smiley face. Emoticon wink. Question mark, because I don't understand emoticons.) Have an excellent day! :{ (Frowny Face/About To Cry Face)**

2:30 pm. The Daily Planet:

Once again, Superman is being interviewed by an admiring throng of reporters. One young chap by the name of Smedley Spork decided to add a certain twist. When Superman glanced at him to see his question, he quickly scooped out his phone and played a video.

"Hey, Superman!" A girl with brown hair sat on a comfortable blue chair. "I love Pokemon, but I'm too busy playing it to see you. Do you like Pokemon? Can YOU catch them all?"

Spork pulled a game console out of his pocket. "Uh, she gave me this."

Superman inspected it. "Interesting! I can and will catch these Pokemon, because I am Superman! WOO! Now, what exactly _are_ Pokemon, and how many of them are there?" Spork facepalmed.

2:45 pm. The Daily Planet,

Superman nodded. "Ah, so that's Pokemon! PREPARE TO BE BEATEN, VIRTUAL WORLD!" He furiously began pummeling the game console.

2:50 pm Fortress of Solitude

Superman sat in his personal chair, gave Krypto a comforting scratch on the noggin, and reopened his game. Almost immediately, his starter Pokemon, a Magikarp, fainted. He tried again. And again. And again. And _again_. At that moment, the alarm blared! Metropolis was under attack by a fiend! Superman ignored the alarm and told Krypto to handle it. Five minutes later, it happened again! He called Supergirl to handle it. One minute later, it happened again! He snarled, closed the game, and stopped the enemy.

3:15 pm Space

Superman floated across space, leisurely playing his game. Well, playing and losing, to be more accurate. He looked to the sun and screaming in anger, punching a satellite in anger! Down below, millions of cable boxes went mysteriously dead.

3: 42 pm Lex Luthor's Latest Death Trap

"Now, Superman, you will feel the wrath of my- Eh? YOU AREN'T EVEN LISTENING!" Lex Luthor raged. "Put down that children's game, and pay attention to the glowing green rocks of doom! Stop ignoring the Kryptonite, darn it!"

4: 16 pm Martha and John Kent's Farm

"Now, Clark. Put away that game and eat your steamed spinach." Martha Kent said.

"SHUT UP, OLD LADY!" Superman whined. Then, he broke the table and flew back into space, sulking.

The Next Day, 3:00 am. Fortress of Solitude

Superman now has a flowing white beard, food stains on his costume, and a twitch in his eye. Frantically, he's hunched over, desperately trying to win his first gym battle. He swore vulgarly as he lost for the seventy-ninth time in a row.

In the background, Krypto looked nervous. His master was acting irrational. Earlier that day, he had yelled at Krypto about 'Magikarps' and 'Stupid non-evolving things!' The computer was wrecked, because Superman had destroyed it after it had yielded absolutely no useful cheat codes.

Five Weeks Later. Fortress Of Solitude

"THAT'S (censored) IT!" Superman screamed. Furiously, he dialed a number on his Justice League communicator. Batman flickered onto the screen, brooding.

"Batman here." he growled. "What is it, Clark?" After taking a good look at the Man Of Steel, he seemed almost worried. "Good God, Clark! Put on some pants! You're wearing a moldy bathrobe over your costume,and what I can see is covered with Cheetos stains and dog food! Uh….Are you wearing a strainer for a hat?"

Superman's eyes popped. "IT HELPS ME WIN POKEMON BATTLES!"

Batman rolled his eyes. "Give it here."

Superman pushed the gaming console inside a boom tube, and watched as it materialized in Batman's hands. Batman stared at it. After about five seconds, the traditional "Hey, you beat the Elite Four!" jingle played.

Superman's jaw dropped. "WHAT? How did you do that? I'm Superman, and you're-"

"I'm Batman." Batman said. Then, before he signed off, he said. "Get some help, Clark. You look terrible."

**SPECIAL BONUS STORY! ****Superman Vs Pokemon: Man Of Steel Version**

Superman brooded. Instantly, he snapped the game console in half, then destroyed a Starbucks. "Ha!" he chuckled. "I love destroying buildings! It's as good as therapy."


End file.
